“The Roof Came Off” – A Reflection On Our Beauty For Ashes Events

 “There was a point in the night when the roof came off and there was nothing to separate us from the glory of God.” – Ari

 

I think she summed up our Beauty for Ashes events best when she said “We facilitated a move of the Holy Spirit.”

 

I’m reminded as I’m writing this that this was never our event. It was never something for us to control or own. It was always His dream first with us as ever willing tools to carry out the work He had already dreamt up.

 

Our last event would surely take the cake on the highest concentration of the Holy Spirit. We all felt it, before, during and after.

 

But I’m getting ahead of myself here.

 

Noche Uno:

 

Nervously swaying at the door, I stood and looked out over the streets of The blessing. The church was decorated. Roses on the tables, hand drawn bible verses taped to the walls, stools arranged, everyone in their places. It was our first event and I was leading it. The fruition of a vision and command I had received from the Lord, it was all happening.

 

We had reached the starting time and three women sat in the room, quiet, a little meek, probably wondering what this whole “women’s night” was all about. Our invites were vague. On purpose.

 

I looked at Ari and said “No way, we gotta hit the streets.” She was quick to remind me that even if only three women sat in those stools, those were three women that the Lord wanted us to talk to and I agreed. But honestly, I thought we could do better. We had handed out nearly 40 invites. I knew there were more women out there.

 

We began knocking on doors, coercing women to come, inviting women off the streets, whatever. I was praying all the while “Lord, bring the women in tonight. This is your event. Let’s do this!”

 

It began to get dark (no street lights), cold and about 45 minutes had passed. We decided to head back to the church and call it.

 

As I peeked my almost discouraged head into the church I counted over 25 women. “Thank You Lord!”

 

Our translator, Dani, who would quickly become a friend, greeted us with laughter and joy. She was excited to be apart of everything and little did we know that the Holy Spirit would rain down on her and through her on our last night.

 

We began teaching about identity and worth and I watched as my teammates brightened the room with their stories and their willingness to connect and teach and be vulnerable. The guys were in it with us, helping us with set up, worship and childcare. We were all committed to the vision that the Lord wanted to speak to the women of the Blessing.

 

I was excited to see the women worshipping along side us, being moved by the message, laughing and enjoying the skit and getting a little more comfortable with us and with each other minute by minute.

 

We served the women a locally made meal that we also got to enjoy and it felt like dinner with family.

 

We ended that first evening giving each woman a rose to take home, a small gesture, but one that left a huge impact.

 

The next day Rachel and Nolo’s tribe of ladies that we run with told us the Blessing was a buzz with the news of “The women’s nights.”

 

I was so glad we didn’t end there. God wanted to do more.

 

 

Noche Dos:

 

A couple of nights after the first event, I got hit with some words from others and some words from God about being a Martha. Driven by work and to be honest, control, I bend in a robotic direction. I know that.

 

God told me clearly. “You aren’t to lead the last two events.” Since that pricked, I knew suddenly that I must be making these events more about me than I should. I confessed to the team that God had told me to step back and Alli and Alayna were there swiftly to volunteer.

 

It was a tug of war between me and the Lord but I’m glad I submitted because everything that followed seemed to be an increased dose of His spirit each time.

 

Alli led the second night on the women of the bible. It was sweet to watch her move through the planning, get frustrated, learn on the fly and ultimately grow. She would later tell me “Wow, I have so much more respect for leaders now.”

 

I step back, I get blessed. She learns, she get’s blessed. Good lesson from my Dad.

 

We saw about five more women join us that second night and many familiar faces. The thing that excited me the most was watching the women interact in a group activity where they had to choose the identity verse that best described their life. We weren’t sure how that would go given these women don’t really “deep talk” like the Oprah raised country we come from. To our surprise, they loved it.

 

The Lord was drawing them to Him and drawing them to each other. We saw a lightness come over them on night two. A comfort. An ease. They were starting to feel it. The Lord was wooing them slowly.

 

Noche Tres:

 

On the eve of our third event, we were already celebrating. Our team had launched it and we were quick to share our resources and encourage other teams on the squad to do them too. By this point, I had already had two meetings with both of our all women teams giving them all the info we had on the events and encouraging them to make theirs their own. Something was happening. Something was building. The Lord was growing this thing.

 

I was filled with joy at watching our team be the first, the lead. It was beautiful to see that my team had, in love, supported the dream God laid on my heart and helped to execute something that now other teams were executing. God’s love was spreading all over Guatemala!

 

Our last event was, for certain, the climax. We felt it and knew it. Our plan was to teach on forgiveness- go out with a bang freeing these women from chains they had carried and leading them to the cross to bear their burdens.

 

We had an outline, and a general safe script.

 

Now that line just makes me giggle.

 

Our planning wasn’t really getting baked the way we wanted it to and it was sweet because no one really worried about it. We kind of shrugged and said “The Holy Spirit will say what He wants.”

 

Initially, I didn’t have a speaking part planning to slink back in the background again in obedience to the Lord but when Alayna asked me to be the one to share the gospel message and organize communion, I knew. I had to do it.

 

I had to do it because the team needed support but more than that, I had to do it because it made me uncomfy. You see, we share Jesus all the time, everywhere we go, but ask me to eloquently sum up the gospel to a room of people where I have no idea where they are spiritually, and I get a little googly eyed. My tucked in, nice Western perspective needs more information.

 

 

The evening had a haze of peace over it from the start which was funny because the enemy was throwing all kinds of arrows. Hard conversations were happening, people were feeling sick, errands were being run last minute, plans were shifting and in all of that we had forgotten to hand out invites so we had to trust that the women remembered there was a third event.

 

I felt complete peace. I stood outside our house with floral foam, some random string I saw and my market found flowers and decorated a wooden cross we would use for the activity that night. Having FINALLY healed, it was the first night my hair wasn’t greasy and I was loving being in my element even with the chaos surrounding me.

 

We decorated the church. It looked beautiful. We set up communion, excited to bring the women to the Lord’s table and explain it a bit.

 

We gathered in the next room to pray as a team and there was a power and authority in our voices that I hadn’t heard before.

 

Something was coming. The armor was being put on. We were ready.

 

Our evening started out normal. Teaching, translating, a baby crying in the background. I’m the proud stage Mom sitting to the right praying for Alayna as she teaches and she doesn’t miss a beat.

 

We’re rolling.

 

We reach a point where we do a skit. Ari is picking up bags of grudges and showing the women how heavy it is when you hold on to unforgiveness. She’s entertaining and mesmerizing but she’s also getting louder and more passionate in her speech. The energy is moving higher. The temperature in the room is changing. We can all feel it.

 

When it’s time for me to get up and share the gospel message, I’ve written something down but the Holy Spirit wants to say more. I looked at my script a couple of times but the jist of what came out was passion. I remember saying “What I am telling you is the secret to life. What I am saying is the most important thing you can hear. Do you know that it isn’t a coincidence that you are sitting here tonight?”

 

I present the gospel and tell them we are going to take communion together after we lay the names of the people we need to forgive on the cross.

 

Feet are shuffling. There are a few tears already. I sit down, cheeks hot. I’m wondering “What is happening. What did I even say?”

 

The women begin writing down names and walking them up to the cross and I’m surprised to see so many. Everyone was participating.

 

Aaron walks in to start worship and the room is buzzing, moving. It’s dizzying really.

I’m pulled to the side to talk with a couple of women who’ve been told they can’t take communion (by another church) because they are living in sin. There’s a man in the middle who struggles with sexuality weeping. Women are clamoring to get their papers to the cross and grab the juice and bread. Aaron is singing louder. A woman in the back begins to stand up and raise her hands in worship. Nolo stops singing to walk around the room and pray. Ari is praying in tongues. Loudly.

 

It’s chaos. It’s beautiful.

 

I swear I saw bands of color floating through the room. You can hear worship and loud weeping and praising and praying and tongues and I’m thinking to myself “This is some straight outta the bible kind of stuff going on right now. If I thought I was a Jesus Freak before…..”

 

The Lord is highlighting women for me to pray over left and right. I find myself knowing what to pray, even specifics about their lives. I’m lit up. I’m heated up. I can feel the spirit moving through me.

 

I’m led to kneel before the two girls who felt like they couldn’t take communion and I grab the translator praying fast like a download from heaven. They are weeping.

 

And it’s not just my prayers that are having this effect. My whole team is experiencing this.

 

The next thing I know, Dani, our translator takes the lid off and starts preaching in Spanish and women are raising their hands and weeping and the room is roaring.

 

This wild went on for about an hour and a half.

 

I think Aaron said it best when he said ‘The spirit in the room was of chains breaking.”

 

God’s glory was in the room. We’d never seen it like that before.

 

At one point I counted – thirty six women and one man.

 

That’s thirty six lives that will never be the same. They’ve been touched by a move of God.

 

The Aftershock:

 

Our team got to debrief and chat through what in the world happened and I want to share some things that came out of that.

 

“There was a point in the night when the roof came off and there was nothing to separate us from the glory of God.”

 

“God’s intention for his body was to encourage others to do much of the same thing as what we are doing. We should be doing things like all the time. Not just on mission. We should be doing this in our living rooms, inviting women from our neighborhoods. God’s gonna raise people up to do this.”

 

“Now that we’ve seen a move of God, we can’t leave the dry churches of America, we have to stay in it, stay weird and influence more moves of the spirit.”

 

“We did nothing but Lindsey submitted to the vision God gave her and we submitted to Her and it happened, a move of God happened out of submission and obedience.”

 

There are many other micro stories. The mother and daughter that reconciled, the women convicted to step out of sin, the homeless woman Ari met on the street that raised her hand to accept Jesus’ salvation. Her male friend, who likely heard the gospel for the first time. The woman who came ready to beat up another woman and left with a rose in her hand.

 

I’ll never know them all.

 

Aaron would later share with me that He had a dream that I was sharing the gospel at the Beauty for Ashes last event days before. Days before I knew it.

 

His ways are so much higher than our own.

 

Thank you if you’ve read this far and thank you if you donated to these events. You’ve contributed to a move of the Holy Spirit.